Faux Pho: Dinner with the BEST Friend

all photos courtesy of LEO

The morning I moved out of my last apartment into my new apartment, Lauren arrived at 8am with coffee. The movers, of course, were four mysterious and unapologetic hours late. After they ripped me off in every possible way, on the only unbearably hot day of the summer, Lauren took me to Target to buy toilet paper and a new shower curtain, then made me a dirty martini and slept over so I wouldn't feel lonely in my new place.

One of the movers - I suppose it wasn't his fault the truck broke down - observed,

"Is she your sister? Or your mother?"

(This might seem offensive except for the fact that Lauren is so obviously not my mother, let alone my sister, that it's only hilarious.)

"No," I laughed. "Just a friend."

"Ooooh," he nodded vigorously. "A very good friend. The BEST friend."

He had a point. I mean, who else - besides my actual mother - would come over and make me soup when I'm all hoarse and coughing and feverish and watch 4 episodes of 30-Rock with me that she'd already seen? Who else but the BEST friend?

no secret pork here.

We'd been plotting a reprise of Bittman's Faux Pho for a few weeks, and in light of certain revelations made on this very site my love of all things MB has escalated to a minor frenzy (or maybe it was just the fever). I wanted this soup, urgently.

God bless Mark Bittman: I always eye the Pho in restaurants, but even at the place my vegan friends go on Argyle, I have a sneaking suspicion that there's some secret fish in the "vegetarian" soup, if not also some secret pork.

Ew. Pork shouldn't be a secret.

lime, chili, broccoli, scallion, napa, basil, sprout, cilantro, tofu, carrot, udon.

something mysterious happens to the basil in this soup:
it begins to taste like coconut, and then like licorice.
i can't explain it; i can only savor it.

As I lined up the accessories for the Faux Pho's photo shoot, Lauren remarked, "Peter is never this patient. He always complains that the food will get cold."

Well, that's what friends are for.

(for those of you who missed out: a great piece on why we maybe can feel hopeful about our food culture by MB.)

Faux Pho (Mark Bittman! You're so clever!)

(adapted from How to Cook Everything Vegetarian)

Ingredients:
6 oz udon noodles (I like to have this kind on hand)
2 tbs peanut oil
2 tbs minced garlic
1 tbs fresh grated ginger
1/2 tsp freshly ground coriander seed
1/2 tsp freshly ground cinnamon
1/2 cup soy sauce + more to taste (I love you, Salt. Let's get married.)
1 cup of diced tofu
2 bay leaves
a handful chopped cilantro
a handful chopped basil
1 fresh thai chili, sliced
2 scallions, sliced
1 lime, cut into wedges
a handful of fresh bean sprouts
2 leaves napa or purple cabbage, shredded
1 cup of broccoli florets, briefly blanched
1 carrot, grated

Method:
In a pot of salted, boiling water, cook the pasta for 5 minutes or until just tender. Drain, rinse in cold water, and set aside.

In a deep skillet or medium saucepan, heat the oil over medium-high heat. When shimmering, add the garlic and ginger, and stir until just fragrant. Add the coriander and cinnamon, and stir until you begin to feel sort of dizzy and intoxicated by the smell of it all (or maybe it's just the fever). Add 6 cups of water, soy sauce, and bay leaves, and simmer while you prepare your vegetables.

Ideally, once Lauren has finished doing all the hard work (i.e., chopping one million vegetables), you'll arrange them in austere little dishes just like CYY's. Just before serving, add the tofu to the broth and simmer for a few minutes.

Finish:
Put a mound of noodles in the bottom of a comically over-sized bowl (LEO prefers a larger ratio of noodles to broth; while CYY prefers a larger ratio of broth to noodles) and ladle broth over the noodles. Garnish with vegetables, herbs, and accouterments as you please, and toast to friendship with a mug of fresh ginger-lemon tea.